my roommate is snoring.

I love staying up late, and going on epic adventures, and chilling out with normal people. 

i love driving with the windows down and blasting music when the weather is perfect.

i love fireworks and magic.

what i don't love...

is being at a crossroad. in my path in life.

When we were young, life was simple because our parents made all the decisions FOR us- there was never any important choices to make, except if we wanted chocolate or vanilla. Now, suddenly as an adult, we get faced with all these... options. and we're expected to just pick one, blindly, without knowing which path is the one to lead to happiness, and which of them lead to mediocrity, and what have you. my question is this: what do i do?

I don't have a passion for anything more than i have for music. at all. music is something that my mind just connects with- i actively listen to whatever music is on, ever- which is why i can't fall asleep with the radio on or anything- i listen and think about all the different parts of the song and all the instruments and the chord progressions and all that, and it keeps me awake!

I love being trained. i love having a private voice teacher. i love being a music major and feeling intellectual. i love that i'll have a teaching degree if i stay at it.

however.

what if i were to stay here, go to school at UCF or some other comm college, get my degree in Public Relations, move my way up the disney corporate ladder and start doing other parts (entertainment, guest relations, make a wish etc)? that would be so awesome! because i love florida. the weather here is so beautiful and non frigid. and no one is stuck on "oh, i'm a music major at OCU therefore i have rights to be a total prick to you". it's just florida- most of the people here are tourists anyway!i could still do voice lessons and private training and stuff on the side... but i mean, everyone is going to need a REAL career, and i can't teach choir, i couldnt handle that. 

so where does this lead me?

confused, that's where. i don't know. i want to go back to ocu for a semester to see how it works with me being performance, see if there are any people worth staying there for

but like... i really dont want to go back to that god awful state ever again. so i'm screwed. i dunno. i guess i'll have to keep thinking, try to figure it out.

now for something completely different

i am highly attracted to a Chilean guy i work with, Franco. SO cute. and very flirty. He decided to teach me to Merengue when we were alone in preshow in the middle of shows the other day, and omggg... twas nice. 

*snaps back*

yup. i need to go to bed. it's like, 2 30 am, and tomorrow i'm off but i have a full day because I'M GOING TO SEE MISSY HIGGINS IN CONCERRRRTT!!! so. effin. excited. 

oh, and we have room checks in the morning. wtf kind of shit is that?! last time i checked, we're all adults here. wtf.